CutebutDeadly.net

he looked me straight in the eyes and i fell in love

i made a new friend today.  Phidippus Johnsoni, otherwise known as the red backed jumping spider (at least that’s my best guess), appeared out of nowhere.  just doing a little sweepy sweepy and all of a sudden he’s hanging from my broom handle and i’m shrieking like a little girl.  tough as i try to be in my ordinary life, my reaction to surprise spiders is quite involuntary and très wussy.  once i had finished my ineffectual dolphin mating calls from the front stoop, i grabbed the camera…

could he be a sexier spider?  i mean seriously…he’s so handsome.  and fashionable.  and he was STARING at me…like really looking into my eyes.

i wanted to get a good shot of his gorgeous red back so i kept walking around the broom handle, but he kept his face toward me…seriously watching me.  it was like we were dancing.  so amazing.  but i realized he was feeling threatened…he kept posturing aggressively, tensing and pushing himself up on his legs, which i snapped a blurry one of…

very suddenly and quite unexpectedly, he jumped at my camera (which was about 3 inches from my face mind you) with my neighbor bearing witness.  i wish there was a photo of this mad little guy charging my camera…i mean…he jumped RIGHT AT THE LENS!  he had a little bungee from his butt to the handle, which snapped him right back.  god that would have been a cream inducing shot.  not to mention, my reaction shot would’ve probably been good blackmail material.

after unsuccessfully trying to chase the annoying asian giant (me) away, little phidippus here got phid up and let the wind carry his ass lasso to a point on the building.  i didn’t realize at the time this was happening.  but as soon as his silk attached he quickly scrambled up the wire.  i was so mesmerized by what just happened that i forgot i had a camera in my hands.  but here’s one last shot of this noble little fucker:

i think i need a cigarette after my tango with this beloved jumping johnson.
i’ll always remember you, phidippus!

(i recommend right clicking and viewing the photos larger)

EDIT:  upon further research, i found out this is a phidippus adumbratus, not the johnsoni, although they are in the same family of jumping spiders.  very cool.

Tags: arachnids, arachnophobia, cool spiders, humanlike spider, jumping johnson, patty yu, phidippus johnsoni, red backed jumping spider, scream like a little girl, spiders are so smart