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i had a fantastic meeting today.
but since my dear john letter is still otw to the other peeps, i’ll give details later.
however, i left the mtg with instructions to take some photos “just as i was.”
and so i did.
and these are a few of those photos.
oh great, i’ve become one of those fucking hipstamatic users.
location: casa de bustillos
it’s been a while since i’ve actually journal-ed on here and it’s hard to say why. i’ve been feeling very private. maybe that’s not a terribly bad thing.
part of me wants to say i haven’t felt inspired. but that isn’t true. i’ve felt incredibly inspired. in life. the life out here — or more specifically out of here [the internets].
or have i?
this is probably very confusing to you, and i will do my best to explain.
i’ve been somewhat withdrawn from the [public] internet since i returned from Australia. not intentionally, but i’ve noticed that i’m updating less often and “forgetting” to tweet etc.
however, i did start some new affairs and they are consuming so much of my brain/heart that perhaps this is why i’ve gone into hiding (lots of projects in the works fyi!).
thing is, i don’t want to update just for the sake of updating. they say bloggers should update often to get the most traffic and adsense hits. well, i don’t put ads on my page. this is specifically for me to spew creative shit, let things off my chest, or for me to process experiences, so eff you blogger advice! i’ll update when i want to update. honestly, i don’t want my readers to have to navigate between ugly ads on my page. i don’t want to manipulate ya’ll into clicking anything just so i make a few pennies. my fortune will come through other avenues i know it.
but i guess i just don’t know how to share when i’m processing shit that’s very close to my heart. can i really share that with the world? i don’t mean to block you out of those experiences, but it’s not easy for me to share certain things. but i’ll try. i’ll try for you.
what i can assure you is that what’s going on with me is good. scary. fun. beautiful…
gosh…what could that mean?
sometimes i can be so selective about what i share on here. other times one might consider my posts over-sharing. i mean pee dreams? those of you who love that post, i know you’re out there.
i’ve found the last several weeks a period of tremendous growth. i have so many ideas and see so much potential in the world. i can’t seem to put into words what i see, so i neglect to update my blog and all those other sharing tools. it’s not that i forget. actually i’m constantly wanting to share some news of success. i forget that most people are more forgiving than i am myself. some of my minor successes i write off, assuming you’d be bored of it. another print job? a commercial callback? oh. we already saw that before.
but it’s not you. it’s me. i’m the one who’s bored. i’m the one who’s no longer impressed. i want something new.
it’s time to level up.
is that why i’m running off to Australia? to mingle with some new blood? and maybe a koala or two?
funny though, i very well could book a commercial that makes me cut my trip to Australia short. it’s actually very amusing to me, and i should just start buying insurance every time i book a flight because this has happened more than once before.
anyhow, one thing i do want to share in this awesomely random, awesomely boring blog, is that sometimes the universe reveals the very thing i’m asking for. and it may not go exactly the way i want it to go, but i just have to trust that how it IS going will take me through all the steps needed to realize my vision.
i learned yesterday that i still have growing to do.
i am so lucky. i am so happy. i am so thankful for this lesson.
you have no idea what i’m talking about, but i promise that you will.
eventually.
audition: verizon
wardrobe description: employee, upscale, classy, restaurant, business boardroom type.
say WHA??
